Out & Equal Summit Day 3 - Wednesday

Women's Leadership Breakfast
Dora from Florida - chat over breakfast re: succession planning & serving homeless queer youth - hard to find an agency like Lambert House in Tampa

Panel discussion - Mentoring in the age of #metoo
Mara - transgender woman and activist. I am by nature an optimist. Too many are "glass half broken" people, but this is the only glass we got. How to welcome trans people in the workplace? Trans women are women first. People are products of their upbringing and experience. Work with people who hate the company as much as you do.😁 You can learn amazing stuff. If you are assigned a mentor, how do you mentor them? Telling your story is how you educate people, and it can be as simple as inviting them over for dinner. Everyone should meet a transgender or nonbinary person while here. A good mentorship is also an opportunity to network.
Patty from Visa - former producer at ABC - Let's take this offline means we're ignoring you. We have to be loud (confident) How to welcome women of color? We can hire them but we have to keep them. Different isn't deficient. Make sure folks are competent enough to manage people as they are. Benefits of mentoring - I'm not crazy. Being mentored helps me mentor. Be real, avoid corporate speak, and cuss occasionally. How can I help people different from me to mentor people different from them? Storytelling is critical. See and hear one another. Where My People At? Need to be pushed to do better. Trust yourself and don't be afraid to mess up. I have so many mentors because each satisfies a different need. [Sounds like polyamory. 😁]
Monica from Accenture - Be bold and ask for what you want, that's what your male colleagues do. We have to pay it forward. That's why I'm here. How do you pass on this knowledge? Huge task to manage the recruiting churn. Global outlook, appreciating culture, is imperative. Grew up in Louisiana, mom from Mexico, so she'll eat anything - spicier the better. Mentoring relationship needs a purpose and a plan. Build the community and commit to do something to use what you learn this week. If you're already in a mentoring relationship, make it work with the tools your company provides.
Erin - Do we take the opportunity to educate those who are asking for our stories as a result of #metoo?

Intimate Conversation with LGBTQ Women of Color
Chavonne - coming out at work? Work and personal life separate until after 30 years, she started dating an older woman in the office. You're not 3 or 4 people, you're one person. Mix up with other ERGs. I'm with InspirASIAN bc I like Chinese food. 😁 If you share your story, people will open up. Handouts for LEAGUE and Safe Space program. Coworker avoided her cube fearing lesbianismwas catching. Others appreciate her wedding photo on her desk. DINE program. Don't give up, invite people to tell their stories and be authentic.
Erica - began her career ostensibly as a gay man although she never identified as such. Still on a journey, ever evolving. Dress shopping: "Are you a dancer? - No, I work in a bank." Representation is important. From Cincinnati. Transition is a process. She began at Chase, and went full-force when she left that job and went to Wells Fargo. Letting people know it's a friendly space is important. Boob grabbing "Are those real?" Would like more representation and recruitment [10% is not enough! 😁] Tired of being the only one. Woman complained about her using the ladies room. Many trans people have a record of sex work. Pay needs to be good - students have loans. Millennials need to be heard or they will leave.
Janet - Chris Rock, Good Hair. Wasn't playing in her neighborhood. Be present, be uncomfortable. A lot of planning and engagement across locations. Executive support is critical. Cubicle decoration - Neutrality is negative.
Jazmine - Students are activists, corporations want to check boxes. West Michigan is a special place bc MI is most segregated state. Team member resource network had 100 members before it went live. Safe spaces are needed, but we need people to understand intersectionality. Allyship is active, not passive. Culture is a recruiting tool. Retention is as important as recruitment. Volunteerism is a recruiting tool. If I see you excluding others, am I next?
Tonia - Met Roberto and it was assumed they were dating when they were actually out to one another & going to gay clubs. Succession planning is important.
Deneen - To be an ally you have to listen and be there. You also have to let people know. ERG leaders should collaborate across corporations. Recruitment - you have to go to where they are. Leadership has to say this is what I want, make it happen. Believe Chicago & Believe Detroit - help people get work and get *to* work. Offer some flexibility. Lesbians of color refusing to be out in the workplace - Be an example and/or show examples from e.g. this conference.
Observation from the floor - lots of GWM and ally perspective to the exclusion of others.
Jazmine - Make a relationship and then ask me questions, *in that order*.
Erica - I didn't ask to be a role model, I'm just living my truth. People don't ask me just about gender identity, they ask me about my hair.
Black and gay in corporate America is still a big deal. Big fear of coming out halting progression & promotion.
Folks are tired. We are proud of young people for being less fearful but resent them not acknowledging we fought that fight for them.
Janet - where there are differences I educate.

Power Lunch
Tara Bunch, VP in charge of AppleCare (+ Christie Smith)
Apple - HRC 100% 15 years in a row
Deneen would like LEAGUE Foundation to earmark one or more scholarships for homeless LGBTQ youth. Suggest chapters engage local resources such as Lambert House and Cocoon House.
India - Of home, school, church, and work, often work is the first place to accept people as they are. When in Rome vs. Embassy model. Brazil - important election upcoming. Multinational companies are uniquely positioned to spread the way they treat their employees to the rest of society.
Erin - Stealth activism: HP withholds 10% of payment for services rendered if the provider team is not diverse. Mass participation exercise.
Amber - Philly Pride flag. Be political in place. 1. Acknowledge and weaponize your privilege: Interrogate your surroundings - who isn't there? 2. Signal boosting - credit the author, ensure the idea remains in play. Do this during the meeting, not after. 3. Calling in - vs. calling out. Show up, speak up, & stand up for each other.
Uncovering - 61% of people cover at work (across all demographics)
Ash - The only thing harder than herding cats is herding gay cats. Authenticity has become a buzzword. Love is a verb, not a badge we claim, but something we do every day - and so with authenticity. Everybody needs a walk-up song. In order to belong, bring your whole self.
Permission slips
Trystan - "gay man trapped in a woman's body" - "he thought I was awesome and I thought he may be on to something". Adopted his boyfriend's sister's kids, then became the first pregnant dude. We can be more than whole, we can be beautiful.
Twitter conversation: belonging matters because... ;)
Nyle - Hanging out with volleyball players in Naples, Florida, asked if he ever wished he could hear. Answer: no. Entire family for several generations is deaf. Bc they don't know how much noise they make, the house is noisy. They moved to Texas so he could attend the best deaf school in the nation. Wanted to be a math teacher, then America's Next Top Model happened. Both being deaf and being queer helps him live his authentic life. ASL "love yourself"

Pinkwashing
Every company recognizes the LGBTQ market, ~$1M, allies 8-10x that
You have to be authentic all year round, not just once a year.
United fits sponsorships into its Social Impact Strategy. Pillars: Inspire the next generation of leaders. Fly towards a more sustainable future. Lift up communities in crisis after disaster. Break down barriers and promote inclusion. In summary, Every Action Counts.
Kimpton Hotels - Trevor Project, No Kid Hungry, and a green/environmental nonprofit. Lots of in-kind donations - party venues, food, entertainment.
AT&T CSR program - We're now a media company. Education, Environment, Consumer Safety, Community. #itcanwait $1M investment, tech upgrades (TrevorText, TrevorChat), employee engagement. 10-year history with Trevor Project. Get your senior management involved.
Stonewall 50 - Companies can't lay claim to the history. Partner with nonprofits and tout the future instead.
Engaging nonprofits: Don't be a jerk. Don't overwhelm an organization with 200 do-gooders on a random Sunday afternoon. Leverage what your employees are already interested in.

Night Out
Dinner at Mae Phim Thai Cuisine on the way to the aquarium. Phad See Ew with chicken, fresh rolls, and Thai iced tea. Had a nice chat with Alex and Chad. Finally introduced myself to the cute bear photographer; his name is Garrick (not Garrett as I texted to Gary). Later ran into Deneen, Chavonne, and Monique from the Intimate Conversation session. Monique is transgender and not feeling represented. I gave her my work email so I can put her in touch with Ginger. While I was taking a sitting break I met a woman of color of a certain age named Rory, from Chicago. I told her the story of "I'm not 22 anymore" and she liked it. I ended up coming back from the waterfront the way I had come: the Union Street stairs. Had to stop a couple of times to catch my breath, but two stops in 7 stories isn't bad at all. Still, it took most of the half hour between catching the train under Benaroya Hall and settling into my seat on the 512 bus from Union Station for me to fully recover.